Window in the Skies

Happy birthday Lord!

This the time for sharing, a year has passed. Deep down, despite hearing all about giving, I find myself less of a sharer than as was a year ago. It is not money or gifts that I am stingy with, rather it is my time and patience. Its a crushing feeling of inadequacy that came about for me in the year that now fades. Even till today, literally today, the computer specialist title is something I detest and shun away from displaying any further. Sorry to everyone if I have been unable or unhelpful in solving any of your problems, I had a string of traumatizing events and wishful thinking that had me rather tied up. As a result, three of my house desktops still remain dead. I haven't spent quality time looking for presents for anyone either. A time shall calm.

My new companions for Christmas:
• The Gift by Corrine May
• U218 by U2

Each journey has been different thus far, some walking blindly, some enlightening. Sometimes living and experiencing the moment is far more important than jotting them now, as I now do the former.

Daunting new year ahead, look forward to the window in the skies.

Window in the Skies :U2

The shackles are undone
The bullet's quit the gun
The heat that's in the sun
Will keep us when there's none
The rule has been disproved
The stone it has been moved
The grain is now a groove
All debts are removed

Oh can't you see what our love has done
Oh can't you see what our love has done
Oh can't you see what our love has done
What it's doing to me

Love makes strange enemies
Makes love where love may please
Soul in its striptease
Hate brought to its knees
The sky over our head
We can reach it from our bed
If you let me in your heart
And out of my head

Oh can't you see what our love has done
Oh can't you see what our love has done
Oh can't you see what our love has done
What it's doing to me

Oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh

Please don't ever let me out of here

I've got no shame
Oh no, oh no

Oh can't you see what love has done
Oh can't you see
Oh can't you see what love has done
What it's doing to me

I know I hurt you and I made you cry
Did everything but murder you and I
But love left a window in the skies
And to love I rhapsodize

Oh can't you see what love has done
To every broken heart
Oh can't you see what love has done
For every heart that cries

Love left a window in the skies
And to love I rhapsodize

Oh can't you see

The Children

Children, mentioned them in my previous entry, the day's events with them has instilled me to elaborate more.

Ever felt mad being under-performing or inadequate? Spend some time with kids. The things they do and what they are, will rob you of distress and helplessness.

When among the Romans, be like the Romans. Its hilarious seeing these kor-kors and jie-jies attempting stuff they did as kids (but barely remember) for these kids. A birthday was celebrated today, and we had a party! An eye-opener for me, to recall various principles of being a kid: Candy is king, over cash, power, race or status. It was kind of melancholic knowing you weren't a kid anymore. You looked at the candies (which they were eyeing enviously) and two dreadful things came to thought:

1. You rather an iPod over candy anytime.
2. You can just walk out of the place and buy some to treat yourself anyway.

An instant when I look at those rascals, I smile and cringe at whatever extractable distant childhood memories I had. Teacher's voice always sounded stern and shrill, and here we were emulating our teachers of bygone times. Here we are, putting on a disciplinary front, while offstage we too were some rebellious teens. Its a vicious cycle of the ages, but being consumed within has left a positive after-taste for me. By chance we had an unexpected reunion, the teacher Ms Joanna was actually Yuan Ruo's kindergarden teacher. And she had a class photo of eons ago to back that up. Even for an outsider, it was really touching when she said she never forgot the class.

We got treated like VIPs at the birthday meal, welfare and food was good. But sometimes I felt we didn't deserve these. One reason just mentioned a few lines ago, and some of us were here to fulfill you-know-what targets. Did the kids care? They just wanted fun, and in those occasions when you needed to be authoritative or encouraging, we truly gave our time, care and attention. Hopefully that made a difference to their childhood.

I shudder to think what they would be like in our place 10 years down. Even if it was just a few days of interaction, it seemed possible to pinpoint and extrapolate the person they would be like down the road. That's a crazy and awful thing. And they wouldn't remember each other, or us. By then, our lot would have graduated from universities, fling flung all around the world.

Here are some of the crazy things I learnt, attempted, did:

• taming attention deficit kids
• quelling quarrels
• attempting to play a proper game with kids that cheat on all the rules while you are not looking
• shocked at the number of vulgarities they know at age of 5
• getting them off the computer
• trying to build imaginary carparks and shopping center with symbolic plastic toy blocks
• playing chess with a kid who was playing checkers (which they call chess anyway)
  

Here are some of the things I feel saddened about:

• Slack definition of our service that included watching hours of the same movie with kids (enjoyable at first), playing bridge with their UNO cards in between them having lessons to beat time, locking ourselves up in the room and "conferencing" when the kids were wreaking havoc outside.

• Hiding the UNO cards away whenever Ms Joanna was around (testimony to how guilty we felt)
  

Haha well, large crowds of kids scare me. But I hope to be back there next Friday when we have more "volunteers" backing each other up there. While at that, a game of "Flyover" too. =P

Heroes

I believe I have found myself, again. Nothing to commemorate except for this post, nothing for anyone. God works wonders. Make things right I said, and in a week, the pieces came together. You can revert to being very childish when a variable in your equation is disproportionately imbalanced. Working with children has enlightened me to the skewed logic and self-deceits I applied, albeit also another good of casting Service drought woes by the water buckets.

'Heroes' is your run of the mill drama on extraordinary humans, ironically I have not seen anything of this genre in such scale since weening off Cartoon Network. But even that channel doesn't have the variety this offers. Individuals around the globe are only beginning to awake to their new found abilities. I like the diversity offered by "around the globe", notably there's a Japanese dude 'Hiro Nakamura', a hero in Heroes, whom can bend space time continuum. There's a rather cool scene when a future him stops the train and speaks to Peter Petrelli: Be the one we need. Save the cheerleader, save the world. Peter then has to find Isaac the painter whom can paint the future to find the cheerleader. Hiro at that time had traveled to the future and obtained a comic magazine by Isaac, and is now following its every instruction.

The Indians have their fair share too. Another great Armaegadon prevention campaign show for the holidays. Seriously its great, check it out. Where?

Hint: www.peekvid.com

Run On

Do you know what strength is?

This guy is... amazing.

Ringing Haemorrhage

Whilst the bells rang for the first and the last of two inconsequential hours. Bunny gave a pep-talk to the mounting obstacle of the chase.

Then he thought: Did he not feel wiped empty and powerless after every attempt. The very pitfalls he wanted to avoid and steer clear of in real life. Almost a joke many times bleeding fatally.

But isn't this a trial?
It's not rocket science that you will kill yourself trying in the process. Trying too hard. Ouch!

Bunny sniggers and goes back to ringing the incessant bells. I'm so glad for having friends like Bunny.

Emancipation

I have been detached from reality, either that or reality has numbed me. No pang no guilt, the alarm bells are supposed to be ringing. The past few weeks haven't exactly been breezes, bouts of storms and calms before storms. Meanwhile the uphill battle against sloth appears never-ending. Half a dozen people I know are just as messy as I am, talk about making sense of creative chaos. I guess banging our heads together doesn't give a good spark all the time.

This time of the year is soothingly cool, great for coffee or tea indoors, or a dissipating walk. Am in dire need of re-orientation of directions and priorities. Am I not standing on the front line, shovel in the hand. Good grief, its not for digging my own grave. Much is seen, much is purported. Now to focus the beam and push steadily.

Fish Burger, Caution!

Five dollars ninety-five cents sits for the last time on the table in front of me. Junk food, just as well for a solitary meal since Dolphin snubbed my offer to dinner. Preparing to lay peaceful destruction on that BK Big Fish, I noticed this circular black sticker on the wrapper.


We have all heard and seen the "Caution! Hot!" labels placating those styrofoam cups for tea and coffee, which only appeared after some retarded American woman burnt her tongue and sued the pants off McDonalds. Its no big deal if its hot, because I can still drink it later in peace of mind when its cooler. But this finding beats the group:

WoW!! Every customer expects to eat a cleanly deboned fish burger and here we have a label cautioning you about fish bones in the fillet. Great going BK, you expect me to bite into that with peace of mind, can I change for another chicken burger or maybe there will be bones in there as well?

Troll Lights

The fifth hour, the watchman stands watch in the rain.
Heaven's light shines on his face.
Righteousness creeps onto his skin.

So its just me?
Yes, you will bear the falls.
Rainfalls?
Beautiful isn't it.

Ah yes, this scene.
I know its name.
Call it

Harmonia
Cascadia
Zirconia